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Knowledge & Infos

Guilt Vs Shame Culture: Must to understand to make better Nepal



Amidst the anger and frustration against Nepalese politicians and government, I see a brighter side — a light needed to guide Nepalese society to better tomorrow, and that is, the ongoing vigorous debates and discussions in an attempt to find flaws in society and people itself and not just politician and government.  Finally, we collectively seem to agreeing to the fact that problem lies in our culture that manifests structural and institutional corruption and incompetency.

There was this famous quote of Mahatma Gandhi and I derived in my own way,

Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits, Your habits become your lifestyle. Your lifestyle if succeeds to influence many, becomes a culture.  This culture becomes foundation of belief system of others.  The beliefs become their thoughts…….repeat.

So, basically how we behave is very much interconnected with what we believe in.  What we believe is very much interconnected with what cultural background we came from.  This belief system on which a society functions is everything behind why people from a society is the way they are.  Nepali society in general is also based on a kind of belief system, which thus can be blamed for the reason behind why Nepalese people and the Nepal are the way they are.

There are two kinds of society
1.  Individualistic society.
2.  Collectivist society.

Individualistic society is the U.S., Europe, Australia kind of society.  Collectivist society is Nepal, India, China, and many other Asian countries.  Let’s leave it up to here and jump to main topics.

One of the main differences between individualistic society and collectivists is, Guilt versus Shame. In individualistic society, fear of guilt is a driving factor to encourage one to be ethical.  In collectivist society, fear of shame is the driving factor to encourage one to be ethical.

So, what does that mean and why shame culture needs to be replaced by guilt culture in Nepalese society?

Let’s start in simple way.  What is guilt?  Guilt is a perceived feeling of being evil or bad.  Feeling of guilt is painful and unpleasant emotion.  Let’s say, you just cheated your spouse who loves you so much but no one knows that, except yourself and still you feel terrible, and so guilty of cheating.  That terrible feelings of cheating is what guilt is.  You must have heard in Hollywood movies, like “I am such a terrible mother, I am such a terrible father.”  This feeling is what guilt is and this sense of guilty feeling is what stops people from wrongdoing.

Guilt culture is the prime reason 
why you just can’t bribe Europeans 
or westerners in general, or why they 
just don’t throw garbage around 
even when no one could see.  

So what is shame?  Shame is perceived feeling of embarrassment.  Feeling of embarrassment as well is an unpleasant emotion.  All those that are caught in corruption charges or wrongdoing, they are terribly embarrassed to face people.  It’s not necessary that the subject is feeling guilty or bad for the act, in terms of ethics and morality.  The subject is only feeling bad from embarrassment point of view.  Say for example, a father does not feel bad beating kids but feels embarrassed when someone catches him beating his kids. Businessman does not feel bad for cheating customers but feels embarrassed when raided and caught wrongdoing.   This sense of shame is also what stops people in general from wrongdoing.

Guilt Society:
“I am not taking bribe because it’s wrong.  I don’t want to go through sense of guilt.”

Shame Society:
“I am not taking bribe because if I am caught, I will be shamed.  I don’t want to go through that embarrassing moment.”

Guilt culture is the prime reason why you just can’t bribe Europeans or westerners in general.  or why they just don’t throw garbage around even when no one could see.  Whereas, people from here don’t throw garbage only if people are around or can be punished for doing so, but do just throw it if no one is around or no strict rules.

A scene from Nepali movie, Tulke Vs Talkejung, best visual illustration of how shame culture used to work in Nepali society and how that used to discourage people from wrongdoing.

To me, guilt society is better than shame society because guilt society encourages you to fear yourself, your emotion and be true to your heart.  Shame society encourages you to fear others, fear people and social norms.  Shame culture, to me is the reason, why corruption is high in South Asian and other collectivist society in compare to individualistic society because right and wrong is defined in collectivist society by shame factor.  Every thing is right for collectivist society if you are powerful to never be shamed or clever enough to never be caught.  You are wrong only when you are weak and when you are caught.

This is one of the cultural drawbacks of Nepalese society that needs to be revised.  Nepal is a “shame society.”  Here, good and bad in large part is not about what one feels, but what others feel, or what law defines as good and bad.  Here, people don’t really feel guilty for acting bad unless is caught and shamed.

To build a new Nepal, we Nepalese must adopt the guilt culture.  People need to abstain from bad and wrongdoing not because “if caught, it is embarrassing” but because “i don’t feel right and i can’t forgive myself.”  This shift in attitude can make the whole lot of difference in way we perceives and behaves.

So, to make better Nepal we must feed the guilt culture and kill the shame culture.  It’s not hard.  There are many who live per “guilt culture” despite of being brought up in “shame culture.”

It’s beautiful, when you fear yourself and fear the sense of guilty feeling and thus abstain from wrongdoing.

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Knowledge & Infos

What’s Special Today: November 10




Historically native to the Indian states of Bihar, eastern Uttar Pradesh and Jharkhand and the southern part of Nepal, Chhath is one of those festivals that transcends the caste system that exists in the society. According to the Hindu calendar, it is celebrated on the sixth day of the lunar month of Kartik. The Chhath Puja is a 4-day long ritual specially offered to the solar deity, Surya, to show thankfulness for good health, good life and to request the granting of some certain wishes.

Day 1: On the first day, the devotees after bathing clean their house and eat the food that is offered to the god to protect the mind from the vengeful tendency.

Day 2: On the second day, the devotees are not allowed to drink even a single drop of water but, in the evening, they eat kheer made up of jaggery, fruits.

Day 3: The evening of the third day which is also known as sandhya ‘arghya’ day where a bamboo basket is decorated with various puja materials, fruits, thekuwa, and laddus which are offered as an ‘argya’ to the Sun. Also, the Chhathi Maiya is worshipped.

Day 4: On the last day of Chhath puja again an arghya is offered to the Sun God but this time in the morning. The devotees go to the riverbank to offer arghya to the rising sun and break their fast and conclude their four-day long worship.

Happy Chhath to everyone! Don’t forget to enjoy some thekuwas!!

World Keratoconus Day:

Every year on November 10, World Keratoconus Day is celebrated to focus global attention on keratoconus and ectatic corneal disorders. The day was first celebrated by National Keratoconus Foundation.

Keratoconus is a disease that causes the cornea to become weak, leading to the thinning and stretching of the cornea, which may result in the loss of vision. Keratoconus is degeneration of the structure of the cornea. The shape of the cornea slowly changes from the normal round shape to a cone shape which affects the vision. The keratoconus mainly develops in teenagers and young adults and the disease keeps on growing, if not diagnosed in time.  

The disease has no prevention and no treatment. With early diagnosis, the disease can be managed and further damage can be protected. In Nepal, the prevalence of Keratoconus is 1 in 2000 according to the recent journal. So, this world keratoconus day, make a commitment to visit an eye doctor once a year for the early diagnosis of keratoconus as well as other eye diseases.

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Knowledge & Infos

Best and Worst Bank in Nepal as per our survey



We had conducted an online survey to find out how banking services in Nepal are being used and perceived by their users. This article is entirely based on those responses. Thank you Muktinath Bikash Bank for supporting us in conducting this survey.  

Over the years, Banks have become an integral part of our daily life and economy. With the shift to digitalization and modernization of the economy, banks have definitely made life easier for people to manage their cash and transactions. With these shifts and increasing dependency on banks more than ever, the use of banking services and users’ banking experience is one of the topics with the minimal amount of research done. Out of curiosity, we conducted an online survey to find out how people have been feeling about the banking services provided by the respective banks.

About Respondents

Respondents were mostly urban educated youth with access to the internet, in the age bracket of 18-40, mostly being from 22-26 age group. The data was collected through social media users, primarily from page followers of KMAG. In total, we got 219 responses out of which 160 were males and 59 were females. 

In the list of questionnaires, one of the questions was “which is your favorite bank from Nepal as per your own experience,” and another being “which bank do you think is the worst.” Among 219, 27 respondents were undecided and 192 casted their votes for “best” and the “worst.” To build the conclusion on more strong foundation, we wanted to make sure respondents voice their opinion per their experience for which we had also asked them to reveal their primary bank.

Out of the total participants, a majority of 89.6% have multiple bank accounts though 19.5% of them just use one of those accounts. The remaining 10.4% claimed to have an only bank account. Out of all those banks, Nabil Bank is the primary bank for 36 participants (which was the highest no. of primary account holders in a particular bank). After Nabil, most of them were primary users of NIC Asia, Global IME, and Siddhartha Bank.

Nabil is voted as “Favorite Bank”

Nabil Bank seems to be the most favorite and popular among the respondents. With a total of 45 votes, it was voted the “most liked” bank. Among them, 29 were the primary account holders of the bank. Under “least liked,” it only got 4 votes.

To briefly talk about Nabil Bank, Nabil Bank is an ‘A’ class commercial bank which was founded in 1984 A.D. (2041 B.S.). It was established as Nepal’s first private sector bank incepted by multinational investors with the objective of providing modern, international-standard financial services. It was first established as Nepal Arab Bank Limited. In 1995, Dubai-government owned the majority of shares was bought by Binod Chaudhary.

NIC Asia is “least favourite”

With 76 votes for “worst bank,” NIC Asia seems like the “least liked” bank from Nepal as per the responses. Interestingly though, it has also been voted as “favorite bank” by 17 respondents.

After NIC Asia, Nepal Investment Bank seems like the second “least favorite” bank from Nepal with 23 votes against the bank.

On being asked the reason for disliking the bank, most of the participants seem to agree on the same point and that is “terrible” customer service of the bank. Similarly, other reasons were bad internet/mobile banking facilities, fraud-like business practices, and lack of important banking services/products being provided by the. Not to forget few were unhappy about the lack of branch/ATM services.

The detailed data are presented in the table below:

BanksPrimary AccountLikedDisliked
Nabil Bank36454
Global IME Bank251710
NIC Asia Bank291776
Siddhartha Bank16147
Sanima Bank13112
Laxmi Bank12101
Mega Bank10102
Standard Chartered Bank982
NMB Bank677
Bank of Kathmandu561
Machhapuchchhre Bank765
Himalayan Bank759
Sunrise Bank752
Muktinath Bikash Bank442
Century Commercial Bank330
Civil Bank433
Everest bank2310
Kamana Sewa Bikas Bank 131
Prabhu Bank Limited838
Rastriya Banijya Bank339
Agriculture Development Bank222
Citizens Bank 521
Kumari Bank321
Nepal Bangladesh Bank222
Nepal Bank325
Nepal Investment Bank15223
Garima Bikash Bank210
Nepal SBI Bank 2111
NCC Bank112
Prime Commercial Bank712
Manakamana Development Bank001
Shangri-la Development Bank100

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Knowledge & Infos

How to design a survey questionnaire

This article was originally designed for KMAG Online Writing Workshop and made available to public for knowledge-sharing purpose.




A survey is a list of questions aimed at extracting specific data from a particular group of people so that the surveyor can gain knowledge and insights into various topics of interest and then mostly generalize the result. How to design a survey questionnaire completely depends upon the purpose behind the survey. Depending on the purpose, questions are framed.

Let’s understand this way, surveyor seeks to know anything based on either of the following grounds:

  1. They don’t know anything, they are curious to find out, and they seek for answers. Example: I don’t know many people smoke and I want to find out by asking everyone out there.
  2. They think they know but they are not sure and they want to find out if what they think they know is actually true or false. Example: I think 50% of Nepalese do smoke but I am not sure yet and I want to validate my assumption by surveying.
  3. They strongly believe that what they know is the facts and now they want to interpret the world based on the “facts” they live by. Example: I strongly believe that smoking is bad and raising tax and making it expensive is the way to discourage people to smoke. I want to survey to find out how many Nepalese believe the same and agree with raising taxes and making it expensive would discouarge people to smoke.

Whatever grounds you are holding, you must frame your questionnaire according to that. So before working on the questionnaire ask yourself if you are trying to know the unknown or are you trying to validate or crosscheck what you think you know or you are trying to pass judgment or views based on your preset theory/hypothesis that your understanding is based upon.

This is how it goes:

You already have a theory and you want to analyze people based on the theory.

Let’s take for example “Job satisfaction Survey.” In this case, as per your theory/hypothesis, to be called “satisfied” one must be displaying so and so traits and views; if not, the person is not satisfied in his/her job. Based on that, you will be designing a questionnaire and see how many people meet the criteria to pass your judgment. If your theory says, highly satisfied people have flexible working hours, one of your questions will be something like “Can you come to your office at whatever time you want and can leave per your own wish as long as you are doing what you are paid for? Yes/No/Depends.” Likewise, there will be other questions set in a fashion to funnel your judgment regarding what percentage of people are satisfied with their job and work.

You have a theory or hypothesis that you want to validate or crosscheck

In this case, you have an assumption but you are not sure of and you want to crosscheck or validate by testing it on people. For example let’s say you think “Most arranged marriage people are unhappy,” and you want to validate your claim or crosscheck the truth in it by surveying among arranged marriage couples. Your questions will be something like “If you have to rate your marriage in terms of joy and happiness in it, how much will you rate on a 1 to 10 scale?” followed by questions like “if you have a time machine, would you go back right before the marriage and take your time to find out someone to have a love marriage? Yes/No/Maybe”

You don’t have any theory or hypothesis and you are only to find out unseen/unknown reality

In this case, you don’t have any preconceived thoughts or assumptions and you are plainly trying to learn or find out in an open-minded fashion.  Like for example, You don’t know how many educated youth from Nepal actually do smoke, nor you know why they smoke despite its negative effect and you are set out to find out the answer by surveying. In such surveys, your questions will be like “do you smoke? Yes/No. “If you smoke, how many cigarettes do you smoke per day?” “despite its negative effect, why do you still smoke?”etc.

Sometimes, you can have a mixed approach, wherein the topic of your interest that you are surveying on, part of it is something you strongly believe being fact, part of it is something you are unsure about, and part of it is something you don’t know a thing about and you are willing to learn.  Like for example, you strongly believe happy couples display so and so traits, and you think couples from love marriages are happier but you are not sure of, and you don’t know at all if personal happiness is valued more in marriage or responsibilities and social factors in the context of Nepal. So part of your questionnaires will be driven by your theory that you consider as being fact, part of it will be intended to cross-verify your assumption, and part of it will be purely seeking truth as it is without any deliberate attempt to frame your assumption.

Bottom line, you should know your ground, the purpose of surveying, what you intend to do afterward, based on which you should be working on your questionnaires.  Your questionnaires will be designed according to your intention, so there is no hard and fast rule but make sure, in the end, you gather all the relevant information so put together to build a conclusion and for that, you need to think about what all needs to be asked to fill up the blocks and connect the dots.

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